We’re back in the desert after our 2-months vacation in Europe. It does feel good to be back in our little Marina apartment. Luca was thrilled to be back in his own bed as well But at the same time, it feels strange. We miss family a lot. It’s so quiet in our flat. Nobody is distracting little Mr. L while he is eating (which made meal times so much more fun!!).

It kind of makes me think about our life here in Dubai. On the one hand, I love it. On the other hand, it’s not easy to be away from our family and friends in Europe. Ten months already that we have been enjoying life in this amazing and ever-changing desert city…

Here are the 10 things I’ve learned about being an expat woman so far:

1. You might change your job

I loved the company I was working for in Switzerland before moving to Dubai. And I loved working in Comm & Events. It was kind of obvious for me to look for a similar position within the same company here in Dubai. So, when we were still in Switzerland, I started getting in contact with my Dubai-based colleagues. The plan was to meet them in person once we had arrived and settled in. I’ve certainly been in contact with them. But until today, I’ve never met them. I somehow accepted another job – without even realizing it. And this new job was not compatible with another job in a multinational company. I accepted to be a full-time mum for now. For many reasons. Within my company, there would have been a big chance that I would have needed to travel. With my husband traveling as well, who would have taken care of little L? Then, there’s the thing about Dubai summers. If you have kids, you better try to go somewhere else for some time to avoid that they need to stay indoors for months and months. It would have been hard to do so with both of us working full time.

2. You might change your mind

Or should I say, you open up your mind? About Dubai, about the Middle East, about Islam. I had a certain picture in my mind of how it might be to live in Dubai before moving here. Artificial. Superficial. No history. Big skyscrapers. No kissing in public. Covered-up women. Some people even told me that I had no right to drive in Dubai as a woman. This is of course absolute non-sense. I had no idea about how diverse this city was. You see women in mini skirt (ok, I would still avoid this) and beautiful abayas. You see breathtaking skyscrapers and the historical Al Fahidi Neighbourhood (Al Bastakiya). You get to know another Islam than the one we often hear of in Europe. You simply have to be curious, to open your eyes and ears.

3. Your friends might change

I have moved from Germany to Switzerland, then to London, Paris and now Dubai. One thing is for sure: Good friends stay. They are always with you, no matter where you are. Then, there are other friendships, which are on stand-by while you’re not here. There might be few contact while you’re not living in the same country but, as soon as you meet again, it is just as if you’d never left. And there are friends that share your way for some time. You have the same kind of life for some time, share the same interests. But you know that these friendships won’t last forever. And that’s ok. I have lost some old friends when we moved to Dubai and I have found some new ones. I know that when we will be leaving Dubai, I will take some of them with me and leave some of them behind. That’s the thing about expat life anyway: people move. All. The. Time. Of course, you make friends, but you always keep this in mind somehow.

4. Your family might change

Or rather what family means to you. I’ve grown up in a small German family. We love each other but everyone is very independent. Since we have moved to Dubai and since I am a mum myself, the relationship to my parents has however changed. I’d appreciate them to be around more often. To be with Luca more often. I think I valued the two months we have just spent in Germany and Switzerland much more than I would have valued time with my family before moving to Dubai. Moving to Dubai has also changed my point of view regarding our own little family. When you live in another country where you don’t know anyone at first, family becomes much more important. In fact, it’s the most important thing for me.

5. The meaning of the word “home” might change

When we arrived in Germany, people asked me “How is it to be home after all this time?”. When we arrived in Switzerland, people asked the same question. When we came back to Dubai, we kind of came home after two months. So, where is home? I somehow feel like a stranger when I am walking through the streets of the little town where I have grown up. And so do I feel here in Dubai. I think, home is probably just where our little family is. That’s it.

6. Your kids might change

Luca was still very small, only three months, when we moved to Dubai. But I can feel the impact life in the desert will have on him. He has friends from all over the world, hears different languages every day, sees all this cultural diversity. He learns about other cultures, other continents, other food. It’s probably the most amazing gift we can offer him. However, he will also be spoilt here in Dubai, by all the fabulous things this city has to offer. Go to the beach? No problem. Swim with dolphins? Why not. It will be hard to top that… It will be hard for Luca to leave this life behind one day. So, better prepare him early😉

7. You might be lonely sometimes

Yes, being an expat woman is great. But it would be wrong to think that expat life is only about going to the beach and spending your husband’s money. It can be damn hard sometimes. When you’re husband is traveling, your kid is ill and you are all alone to manage everything. None of your family members or old friends around. Of course, it’s quite easy to make new friends here but it sometimes just isn’t the same. There might still be moments of loneliness.

8. You might do things you’d never thought you would do

And I am not only talking about desert safaris and going up to the highest building of the world. I never thought I would be a stay-at-home mum someday. I never thought I would be a cooking (!! those who know me will understand) expat wife. But it’s good to make changes in your life from time to time. To learn something completely different. To live a different life. I’ve always loved working a lot but my days were so fully packed that there was no time left for the simple things. Like listening to your baby’s giggling or enjoying a yummy freshly cooked dinner with your husband. I don’t think my life would have changed if we’d stayed in Switzerland. I was very happy in my old life, don’t get me wrong. But it’s nice to change perspective from time to time.

9. You might change

Because you evolve. Because you learn. If you want it or not, the country you’re living in has a certain impact on you. You adopt certain local expressions. You adapt your clothing. Certain new habits slip in (did I mention that I eat hummus every week or so?!). You don’t realize it at first. It is your family and friends who come to visit that notice the changes. Oh, and you adapt to the local behavior. When we arrived in Dubai, some work needed to be done in our apartment. I was supposed to let the technicians in as my husband was at work. They were late. As a German having lived in Switzerland for years, I called them after 15 min. They told me that they would come in 10 min. Insh’allah. After 10 min, nobody came. After 30 min, still nobody. They finally arrived after 1 or 2 hours, I don’t remember. I was really upset at that time. Today, nearly 10 months later, I am happy if they come more or less around the time they indicated

10. You might not want to go back

And that doesn’t mean that we will never go back to Switzerland (I don’t want to scare my mother-in-law😉 ). But I have to admit that leaving Dubai one day will be difficult. I will miss the never-ending building sites and the fact that a neighborhood might look completely different after some years. I will miss it to be able to get food delivered to your flat. To get anything delivered to your flat actually. I will miss being able to ski and to go to the beach on the same day, to be woken up by Ferraris and fireworks. And to get to know interesting people from all over the world every day. I will miss Dubai when we need to leave in some years. Luckily, our big Dubai adventure has just started